Why did I study continental philosophy?
- Because I failed high school calculus.

How analytic philosophy works.
- "A hand consists of five fingers, thus five fingers are attached to a hand (Russell 1920). In the other words, hands have five fingers, so we may declare that hands have five fingers with a fair degree of certainty."

How do you convince social constructivists that the theory of gravity is not mere social construction?
- Throw the social constructivists off a tall building.

"The totality of our so-called knowledge or beliefs, from the most casual matters of geography and history to the profoundest laws of atomic physics or even of pure mathematics and logic, is a man-made fabric which impinges on experience only along the edges." -- W.V. Quine